Print

Clever Facebook Status

A compilation of some clever Facebook status messages which will make you bow with respect to all the creative minds which came up with these ideas. Continue reading.....
If reaching out to the whole world is what you aim for, resorting to status update feature on Facebook is the simplest way out for you. Statistics reveal that more than 400 million users log on to this social networking website every day. Though you may not reach all these 400 million users, your near and dear ones are sure to hear you through your Facebook statuses. At the same time, you also need to take into consideration the fact that your status updates and people's interest in them are directly related to each other. If you can come up with catchy Facebook statuses on a regular basis, people will surely like them and keep a track of your updates.

Creating Clever Facebook Status Updates

So how do you come up with cool status updates which will grab the attention of fellow Facebookers right from the word go? The key is to keep your updates simple, something which other people can relate to and, most important of all, funny. You can leave the rest to the news updates, which will make sure that everybody knows that you have updated your status. The creative minds behind the 50 odd funny status ideas given below surely deserve an applaud for their creativity quotient.

Some Clever Questions
Other than telling the whole world what you are doing, you can also use your status messages to initiate random conversations with friends. You just need to ask a question and your wall will be loaded with answers - some of which will defy the very basics of logic. Given below is a compilation of some questions which you can use as your status updates.
  • If there are no stupid questions, then what kind of questions do stupid people ask?
  • Why get married and make one man miserable when I can stay single and make thousands miserable?
  • Would you rather meet an alien visitor or travel to outer space?
  • If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
  • If the lessons of history teach us everything, why is it that nobody learns the lessons that history teaches us?
  • If swimming is great exercise, explain whales to me?
  • Would you rather be a enormous hamster or a tiny rhinoceros?
  • If winning doesn't matter, then why keep score?
  • Why is the newspaper far more interesting when someone else is reading it?
  • Can't stop wondering how can some people around him be the fastest among the 10 million sperms they raced against?
  • Why in the hell do I have to press 1 for English and be left on hold for ten minutes to ultimately speak to someone who can't speak English?
  • If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
  • Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?
  • If a person who drinks too much is an alcoholic, then is someone who never drinks called a non-alcoholic?
  • If "poly" means many, and "tics" mean bloodsucking creatures, then what does "politics" mean?‌
  • How long do you think it would take to solve a Rubik's cube if you were color blind?
  • Why do people put designs on toilet paper? It's not like when they wipe their butt there gonna be like Oh my god! a flower!!
  • I sometimes watch birds and wonder "If I could fly who would I shit on?
  • If a mute person burps, does it make a sound?
  • Have you ever woken up, after having a dream that you ate the worlds biggest marshmallow, and your pillow is gone?
  • Have you ever had a fly or small bug land on your computer screen? I bet your first reaction will be to try scaring it with the cursor!
  • How come we live in a world wherein the pizza arrives before an ambulance?
  • Why is it called a prayer when people talk to God, but schizophrenia when God talks back to people?
  • Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but duck when you throw a revolver at him?
  • Why am i not able to update my Facebook status?
Some Clever Sayings
You can also use funny sayings as your Facebook status ideas - and there is absolutely no doubt about the fact that they do serve the purpose. Given below is a compilation of some clever lines which is bound to leave you with that wicked smile.
  • When you have a good imagination, you can make up all the facts you want!
  • Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear.
  • Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.
  • We learn something every day, and lots of times it's that what we learned the day before was wrong.
  • Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
  • Don't ever wrestle with a pig. You'll both get dirty, but the pig will enjoy it.
  • Sure God created man before woman, but then again you always make a rough draft before creating the final masterpiece.
  • What the world needs is more geniuses with humility, very few of us left.
  • A wise man gets more use from his enemies than a fool from his friends.
  • Some people wait their entire life for their ship to come in, not realizing that they are standing in an airport.
  • I've been trying to workout this week, but it hasn't been working out.
  • Don't let schooling interfere with your education.
  • Never interrupt your opponent while he's making a mistake.
  • Don't let your mind wander, It's too little to be let out alone.
  • Yield to temptation. It may not pass your way again.
  • If you're so caught up in avoiding lightning, you may not ever enjoy a single thunderstorm.
  • Every rule has an exception, especially this one.
  • God gives every bird a worm, but he does not throw it into the nest.
  • Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.
  • They keep saying the right person will come along, I think mine got hit by a truck.
  • The person who reads too much and uses his brain too little will fall into lazy habits of thinking.
  • All men are born free and equal. If they go and get married, that's their own fault.
  • Listen to your heart; although it is on your left, it is always right!
  • Asking a writer how he feels about critics is like asking a lamp post how it feels about dogs.
  • Some things man was never meant to know. For everything else, there's Google.
Inspired by the funny statuses given above, you can also come up with some status ideas of your own. Your status messages will make people laugh just like the aforementioned updates made you laugh your heart out. The status update facility provided by Facebook is just one of the numerous tools of social networking that the top social networking site - Facebook has to offer for its 400 million users, and it does play a crucial role in making Facebook so popular in the cyberspace.
By Abhijit Naik
Published: 12/20/2010
Bouquets and Brickbats
Name: