Aftermath of Bullying

My experience with bullying. Only a little bit though.
The aftermath,
The "after the fact",
After all the crap that happened,
I'm still here collapsing,
I'm still here,
With that trauma from the bullying,
It used to be...

A different day,
But the same things are happening,
"Priscilla, you're really ugly",
"You look like a man",
"Are you a boy or girl?",
So many different insults, I can't tell.

Previously, I was the most outgoing person,
You'd ever know about,
Jump in a conversation just because,
The topic of it was something I knew about,
Talked to anyone I wanted to,
Wasn't scared of the shit they might say to me,
I was a "I don't give a fuck" type of individual,
In a good way though.

The bullying turned me into someone else,
I started hiding under desks in class,
I started shutting myself off from life,
I started to fetch that knife,
And slice my own skin.

Every morning, I would make cut after cut.
Quite a few times during school,
I would make cut after cut,
When I got home and nighttime,
I would make cut after cut and cut,
It just wasn't enough.

Now my past is haunting me,
How further can I go before I break,
And end up like that again,
Please don't let me fall,
And I wish to be dead again.
Published: 11/23/2013
Reflections of the Mind...
Bouquets and Brickbats