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Being Beautiful - Chapter Twenty Seven

Briana is a 16-year-old girl who hosts a web show. She doesn't know her life without it and she just gives great advice on how to love yourself and no one else.
I paced around the guest room that Liz and I had to share together. Kaleb was sleeping in Alexander's room, and Lucas and Liam were sharing Kaleb's room. It was past one in the morning, but my nightmares were preventing me from having a good night's rest. Most of them were about previous things that had been going on in my life and others were about James.

The first time that I ever started having bad dreams about James was two days before he just left without any heads up. I knelt down in front of the bed and sighed deep and heavy. Why was I feeling like the world was crashing down on me? I had just won an award and met so many new
people, but why was I feeling like this? Why is all of this happening now.

"Briana?"

I stood up and turned to the voice that was my sisters. She had rolled over and rubbed her eyes and was now looking at me. "Sorry."

"Are you okay sweetie?"

"Yeah, I was just about to go get some fresh air." I slowly made my way towards the door. "Go back to sleep. I'll be back before you know it." I quietly walked out of the door and pulled it shut. I kept my hand on the handle and placed my head on the door.

"Making your great escape already?" I turned and saw Kaleb standing there with no shirt on and a soda in one hand. "I don't think that my heart could handle it if you left me all too soon." He noticed the look on my face and his eyes crinkled. "Everything alright Briana?"

I sighed. I didn't want him to worry about me, but if I lied to him he wouldn't believe it one bit. "I'm fine." He huffed and then stared at me more intently which made me smile. "I'm just having bad dreams."

"Oh..." He looked down. Why was he being so awkward? Before I could say anything, he looked back up at me and spoke. "Do you wanna go somewhere?"

"Depends on where."

All he did was smile.

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Kaleb took me to his roof. There's this little indent where two windows kind of bend down and that's where he sits and that's where we went. The view was amazing. The house was just the right size that it looked over most of our town. We both sat down silently at first until I looked at him.

"How'd you find this place?"

"The day that Alexander and I happened to meet you-" I rolled my eyes.

"We were looking around the house to find stupid things that no one would notice. Then we found this space. Alexander wasn't fond of heights, so I just come here."

Silence.

"What do you do when you come up here?"

"I think," he said looking across the sea of houses. "About things that I've done, things that I could have changed and things that I don't want to change." I looked across the sky with him. "What were you thinking about that is keeping you up at one in the morning?"

I sighed. "Where should I start?"

"That bad?" I shrugged. "Start from the beginning?"

"You don't want to know the beginning."

"But I do..." I looked over at him. "I'd rather listen to you right now than anything else because nothing else makes sense."

"Neither do I."

"But I love to hear you talk anyway," he muttered. Who knew Kaleb could be so sappy?

"Well..." I said leaning back. "I was diagnosed with depression when I was 12. Not the kind where you cut yourself, or think suicidal thoughts or whatever. It was like the kind where I dreaded going to school everyday, where I'd break down crying at any moment of any day, where I'd just sleep for hours upon hours and be so tired no matter what."

"Was this because of that James guy?" I nodded. "He put you in depression?"

"I know it sounds stupid, but..." I looked up. "I never had a guy give me that kind of compassion that he did? I mean, it was different. He'd hug me, he'd kiss me. I was twelve and I'd been kissed more than I even know what to do. But I guess the kisses didn't matter, it was just the fact that he was... there."

"Wasn't Ian?"

"Ian was always there, but we didn't want to confuse people with our relationship. He's my best friend, but in public it would look different."

"Because you two were close like... that?"

"We didn't get that close until after James left. Ian knew that I needed someone there because of how needy my state of depression was." My eyes began to water some, but I didn't want to cry.

"And.."

"And it worked." I looked at him. "You see I'm fine now."
Kaleb stared at me and then looked forward. "How do you do that?" He asked.

"Do what?" I asked looking at him.

"Do that thing where you sound so needy, but you won't show it. You do this thing where you sound so sad, but strong at the same time."

"There's something about me, remember?"

The wind blew some and picked up the chill around us. I wrapped my arms around my sweater to hold it down some. Kaleb, still naked and unfazed about the whole wind deal, wrapped an arm around my shoulders and pulled me into his chest. I was done for after that. I just began crying. It all came as a shock and surprise to me, but not to Kaleb. Apparently he knew what it was like to just cry.

"Why do you like me so much and I'm so broken?" I muttered into his chest after I was done crying.

"Because I know what it's like to be broken and it's not a great feeling." He kissed my forehead. "I like you for you, not your baggage."

I smiled, wiped my eyes and leaned up. "Who knew that you could be so sappy?"

Kaleb just rolled his eyes, but smiled. "Only for you Briana."

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Author's Note

Alright Guys,

It's kind of short, I know. But I didn't know how to start writing this story again because it's been so long since I've written it. Get my drift? If you hate it, sorry but I can't please everyone. If you loved it, yay! Give me pointers on if it's the same as the other one I've written.

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Comment Replies

I'm not gonna do replies in this chapter because some hurt my feelings and most of them were from months ago. I don't think that some of the people that commented are still fans. So the comments that I get on this chapter, I'll post replies in next chapter. I won't stop writing this story anymore. I love you guys.
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Published: 3/14/2013
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