How to Break Up Nicely

Breaking up can be a tough task to handle. Not to mention that it may cause a heartbreak. Nonetheless, there are several ways to break up in a nice way. Let us check them out (and, maybe, try them out as well)!
"Juliette and Romulus (yes, the names are changed to keep the identity private) were in a very intimate relationship for a long span of 4 years. They knew each other since childhood and were high school sweethearts. That is why, when it was time to get in to a college, they decided to have the same choice. They filled in the applications and got into the same college. Juliette chose Psychology, whereas Romulus, selected Media. Soon after they joined college, differences started surfacing. They ended up having very little time for each other and started finding interest in other people. After around 6 months of a rocky time in college, Juliette decided to end the misery and call it quits. She invited Romulus for a coffee one evening and ended the relationship. The two of them are still the best of friends and enjoy spending quality time with each other, occasionally."

So, what exactly did Juliette do to carry out such a smooth relationship break up? Well, I guess she just knew how to break up nicely. Let me share some of her knowledge with you (just you, because you are a dear, dear reader!).

Most people prefer to have some link with the person or be friends after the breakup. I agree with such people. Just because the relationship didn't work out, does not mean that the person does not exist, right? So, how would you know how to break up with someone nicely? Well, you need to search within your heart (or mind) for what you truly feel for the individual, despite your relationship issues. Often, when a girl is trying to figure out how to end a relationship in a nice way with a guy, she ends up thinking emotionally. Bad idea! Be very practical while you consider breaking up, it will be easier on you as well as on him, that way.

If you have had a long-term relationship, you need to depend on the understanding that you'll have shared, to know how to break up nicely, in the real sense. Make him realize that the relationship is not working, and pulling it further, will only lead to disaster, for the both of you. So, speak the language that he understands. If he is not a very emotional person, then don't get emotional while breaking up with him. If he is a very intimate and romantic person, then convey this to him after, probably, the best love-making session possible. If you'll have gotten engaged, then, return the ring, and do it as gently as possible. The bottom line here is to make sure that he does not feel that you think he is someone bad. This could have negative repercussions on his personality, as well as the link that you are trying to forge.

If you have not been in a very long relationship, then it is most likely that you both have not really gotten to know each other. Hence, it would be best to be as straight forward as possible, while ending the relationship. However, don't be blunt. Be gentle while conveying the message, but be clear. Make sure that you don't give out the wrong impression. And please make sure that you don't use the words "on a break", it didn't work for Rachel and Ross (from the TV series "F.R.I.E.N.D.S"), it will not work for you! Another thing that you need to make sure that you do not do, is to abscond. It would be absolutely ridiculous and cowardly to disappear for a certain span of time. Yes, this would definitely end the relationship, but it would end the trust that the person has for you as well. Now, you wouldn't want that, right? So, when you are thinking of breaking up nicely, you need to concentrate on the single word "nicely", this will help you out to quite an extent even while moving on after the breakup.

There will be many resources available on the Internet to help you out, but the only answer that would help you out, truly, is the one that you will find in your heart. Ego, attitude and reason, often, are aimless in relationship aspects, depend on your instincts and your inner voice. Trust me, it will help you out.

This is where I sign off! Take care of yourself and your partner!
By Rashida Khilawala
Last Updated: 10/11/2011
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