This was where it started. The pain sometimes unbearable. The joy of being with those certain people, only to be hurt by them in the end. The ones she loved became lost at one point. The anxiety of thinking how things would turn out for her. She didn't want to turn out like the people she thought loved her so dearly. Her parents were divorced before she left and so unhappy with their lives that they didn't know her existence. Her whole life she tried to accomplish the hardest things to gain some attention. That's where everything started. Her family only consisted of her and the people who gave her a home and ignored her nevertheless. No siblings were there for her when she needed them the most.
They hadn't deserved the title as her parents. They still didn't. All 28 years of her life was based on what she did wrong and what caused her 'family' to be how it was. She listened in on their conversations that went from whispers to shouting within seconds. If they couldn't bear each other, why hadn't they just divorced at her young age? She would have rather been tossed between the both of them than stand them fight routinely. If that was their way of showing their love they were lousy at it. She stared out at the vast city where she had spent most of her life at. She spent years in one city then the next but this one was where she learned how to live. This was where she understood the difference between the liars and the truthful. The difference between that thing called love and the fake kind that was easily given out to others. That was why she left here when she had a chance. The melancholy feeling of this town had changed her perception on the world around her.
She was overall a very happy person. This place changed her. She wasn't depressed or anything that made her seem like a dejected person. She was just ultimately thoughtful. She remembered this hill where she parked her car and looked out at this place. Her first feelings of love were sparked here. It was the kind of love a person would normally envy for. It had lasted so long. It wasn't that fake love she had become to know so well. It was real. That was 10 years ago. She didn't really know what had become of him. She didn't know if she missed him or not. In her own mind she had no idea why she had come back. She was already living that successful life she only dreamed of so long ago, only now it was reality. As she sat in her car with the top down, the stars glittered above her. Sitting in the driver's seat, she gripped onto the wheel while her thoughts of why she was there plagued her. Why had she come back?
All that she left in this town was a trail of complications and memories that she meant to leave behind and forget. She left this place quicker than she wanted to. After high school there was no reason to stay. Even though she would have missed those people, she had set her mind on leaving before she knew what would have happened at school. She could have dropped out or something along those lines but she stuck out. Her memories had flooded back as she sat there. It seemed like only yesterday she had been by that ocean beyond the bridge. The cold, dreary weather she had become so accustomed to then, had turned a normal day to a freezing wreck. She spent her day with her friends and the waves hammered onto the sand loudly. The wind blew the sand around and the feel of running on the cold sand restricted her feet from wanting to move anymore. Oh how she craved for that memory to be re-experienced. For once she missed that unsympathetic weather. Where she lived now it was so warm and pleasant but when her mood drowned, she had wanted that weather to accompany it. While her memories pulled her into a trance, her phone rang. It was her mother.
She hesitated to answer it but did so anyway. Since her mom had not been entirely respectful towards her it didn't mean she had to treat her the same way. "What?" she answered in that harsh tone she had become used to using. "That's no way to talk to your mother." Her mom had said in her annoying happy voice. "When were you ever a mother to me?" she replied with so much venom. "Oh sweetheart, don't say I never acted like a mother to you. I fed you and made sure you were alive. I also made sure you went to a good school and had good clothes. That's all that you needed." Her so-called mom scoffed. Tears threatened to spill from her already closed eyes. How could she say that she was a mother?? This was why she left. Lies like that had made her sick to her stomach.
Wasn't love an option in her mother's terms? "Don't lie to yourself. If you thought you were a real mother you really are delusional." She seethed into the phone. "Is this because your father and I divorced?" her mother questioned curiously. She sighed. She didn't want to deal with this. Her mom didn't get it. She was so convinced she was a great mom, it was hard to pull her out of that daze. "No it's not. Look I'll pass by later. Bye." she said while positioning to press the end button. "You're here? Back in this little town? I thought you dashed out of here without planning to come back." Her mother laughed humorlessly. "I did but I guess there's some unfinished business I have to attend to." she said before hanging up.