Kim hesitantly shut her car door, half wanting to jump back in and speed away. The more reasonable half of her told her to go on with it. Slowly, as if the next step she took would set off alarms or something, she made her way up the short front steps. Upon reaching the door, she put her key in the lock, and the door creaked open. Kim threw her purse and coat on the kitchen table, and without turning on any lights, made her way up the stairs to the second level. Walking down the hall, Kim stopped at the second door on the right. Glancing at the small bed and pink walls, Kim felt a deep loneliness set in. She walked into the room and unplugged the night-light since Sarah wasn't there to use it anymore. The feeling of finalization set in as the room became an eerie black.
Kim sighed and made her way to her room. It was way too quiet in the house. Maybe she'd move to a smaller house. This house was way too big. There was too many memories here. Maybe she'd get a dog. With occupying her thoughts on dogs, she turned on the radio and turned the volume all the way up. She slowly made her way to the shower that was in the built-in bathroom she had in her room. Getting in, the hot water felt nice after the long day at work. She didn't know what she'd do tomorrow. She couldn't just stay at work until 9:00 every night, even if she wanted to...
The chorus to Lady Antebellum's song 'Need You Now' came flooding into the bathroom as Kim's thought cleared.
It's a quarter after one, I'm all alone and I need you now. I said I wouldn't call, but I've lost all control and I need you now. And I don't know how, I can do without, I just need you now!
She let the words sink in. The song made her think of her late husband. She had to fight the urge to run out of the shower and shut the damn radio off, but instead she stood there and cried. She cried because she knew she was never going to see him again. She cried for all the times they had fought, and for all the good times they had, and the good times that were yet to come. She cried for the children they hadn't had yet, and for the daughter that did have, who would never experience having a best friend or worrying about what to wear, or dating, or graduating, or even getting married. But most of all, she cried for herself. She had no idea what she was going to do. Her paycheck alone couldn't pay all the bills.
Kim got out of the shower with a migraine, and feeling worse than when she had gotten in. She threw on one of Chris's oversized t-shirt and crawled into their bed, knowing when she woke up in the morning, he still wouldn't be there. Feeling extremely depressed, she began crying yet again. So much for not letting her losses get the best of her. Maybe she'd call in sick tomorrow. She really didn't want to be around anyone anymore. She just wanted Chris, to hug and to hold. He always knew the right things to say when she was in a bad mood.
"Oh, Chris," she sobbed into his pillow, "I miss you so much. I need you Chris. I can't go on..." With that she cried even harder than she ever had, and eventually fell into a fitful sleep, dreaming of Chris.