Random (1)

Just random stuff.
"This lake is huge!" Thomas exclaimed, as he chucked his shirt aside.

"No!" His friend, Sam, yelled. "Wait-!"

It was too late. Thomas had ran backwards, gaining momentum, and then he sprinted towards the lake and dived in like a canon ball.


His head smacked against the solid surface, knocking him unconscious. It was the middle of winter and the lake had turned to pure ice. Thomas' limp body slid over to Sam, who was shaking his head at the sad sight.

"Idiot," he mumbled.


"My four-year-old said something funny the other day..." Trisha began, as she stroked her son's head softly.

Her younger sister, Layla, sat down on the bed, watching her caress him.

"What did he say?"

"He wished people didn't have to knock," Trisha said with a light-hearted chuckle.

Layla smiled, a smile that didn't quite reach her pale-blue eyes.

"He's such a goofball," she replied softly, looking into Trisha's eyes. "Much like his mother."

This made Trisha chuckle harder.

"Oh, dear! Don't make me laugh," the older sister tittered, clasping her hands against her mouth. She nodded towards her son, as she whispered, "He didn't get much sleep last night. I don't want to wake him up."

"Don't worry," Layla sighed, gazing at the corpse of the little boy. "I don't think he will."


"So, tell me..." The man leaned over the counter, hands propped under his chin, "How did you die?"

Jason leaned forward and pressed his lips against the bartender's lips.

Startled, the bartender jumped back, almost knocking over the wine racks behind him. A look of perplexity flashed across his wizened face, as though he couldn't believe the absurdity of what just transpired.

Jason smiled sweetly. "That's why."

The man raised a bushy eyebrow quizzically.

"I kissed the wrong person," Jason explained, "without her consent. Her boyfriend cracked my skull open."


"You promised you'd give us a happy ending. So, where is it?" Her voice dropped into a wobbly whisper. "Where's our happy end-?"

"Listen," he interrupted, finally peeling his eyes away from the television screen. "Life isn't a fairytale," he paused for a moment to burp. Well, it sounded more like a belch, caused by his excessive drinking of beer. "You're not a princess. Get over yourself, sweet cakes."

Her eyes and her mouth were frozen wide open in an expression of stunned surprise.

"Are you serious, Derek?"

He groaned internally, as he learnt to recognize that tone of hers. He was in for another round of nagging.

"Let's not fight," he said, as he laid his beer down on the coffee table. Reclining lazily on the sofa, he patted his lap, gesturing for her to join him.

He winked cheekily. "Why don't you come here and gimme a happy ending, eh?"
Published: 1/22/2020
Bouquets and Brickbats