Jeremy's hand tightens against mine for a brief second before letting go. My hand drops to my side as he walks towards his bed. He sits in the middle of his bed, crossing his legs, and once he's settled, he looks over at me. There goes any hope of us kissing tonight, I think. Thanks, Jack.
I start to feel self-conscious again. I'm standing in yoga pants and a slightly oversized, long-sleeved t-shirt. My makeup, or what's left of it, is probably smeared from the crying and I'm sure my eyes are red and bloodshot. "Come here." He says, holding out his hand. His voice shakes me from my insecurities and I step towards him.
His hand tangles with mine and he brushes the pad of his thumb over the back of my hand as I climb onto the bed beside him. "So, you didn't exactly say why you were so scared earlier." He pauses and looks at me. I don't know if he's expecting a response or not, but I don't know what to say so I stay quiet. "Do you want to talk about it?" He asks, after a moment passes.
I shrug. "I don't know. This is something I would have gone to Andrew about but..." I sigh and shrug again. "I don't know. We had a fight, I guess. I don't feel like I can go to him anymore."
My phone beeps from the pocket of my duffel bag that I'd shoved it in. I glance over at it, but don't make a move to reach for it. Jeremy looks over when it beeps again, and for a few seconds we just stare at my duffel bag. It starts ringing and I decide to at least get it so I can turn it on silent, to avoid waking up anyone in the house. When I start to move towards it, Jeremy's hand tightens on mine. I turn to look at him. "I'm just gonna grab my phone." I say. He slowly let go of my hand and I unzip the pocket to take my phone.
Just as I'd expected, it's Tyler. I hit the little button to turn it to silent and then I move back to Jeremy's bed. He takes my hand in his again, his thumb rubbing back and forth against my skin. "I know that I've probably sent you some mixed signals..." Jeremy hesitates towards the end of his sentence, and I flash a small smile.
"Probably? Try definitely."
He chuckles. "Alright, definitely." His smile fades slightly as he stares at me. "But I do like you. And I need to know you know that. Whatever's going on in your life right now, you can talk to me about it. I can be here for you."
I bite on my bottom lip, an effort to keep my wild emotions in check.
He rubs the back of his neck with his free hand and shrugs a little bit. "I'm probably not the best with advice, or anything really, but I can at least be here to listen to you if you need it. Especially with things like this. I don't want you to ever be that scared of anyone, or anything."
"I'm not scared, right now." I say. "You make it all seem less threatening." My voice is barely above a whisper. I keep my eyes on my phone, as another call from Tyler comes in. It doesn't ring because I switched the sound off.
When I do look up, I see Jeremy's gaze focused on my phone. "Is it whoever's been calling you that's scaring you?" He asks, turning his eyes to mine.
I'm afraid if I throw all of my past relationship drama onto Jeremy all hope of us ever being together will be lost. I can't just toss my baggage onto him. Not yet anyway. I shake my head. "No, that's just Andrew. I don't feel like talking to him right now."
My phone lights up again as yet another call from Tyler comes in. I turn my phone upside down so I don't have to see the screen. "Andrew again?" Jeremy asks.
I nod. "I'm sorry about this." I'm starting to regret agreeing to come over here tonight. As much as I love being around him, especially right now, since he openly admitted liking me, I'm nervous about being too much for him to handle. The drama I'm facing right now might prove to be too much for him to want to deal with. I don't even want to deal with me right now.
"Don't apologize. And don't feel stupid. None of this is your fault. None of this makes you stupid in any way at all."
I nod, but I'm not sure I agree with him. It's my fault for dating Tyler for so long. But then, he doesn't even know about Tyler. Maybe he would think differently if he knew the real reason behind my being scared.
"Can I ask what you and Andrew fought about?"
"We argued because he told me I was being a bad friend. That I was lying, and ignoring him. Which is true, and I apologized for it, because it wasn't like I had intentionally spent less time with him. But then he accidentally blurted out that he's been planning to move since the end of February I guess. And he wasn't even going to tell me yet. He's leaving in about three months, and he didn't think I deserved to know, or something. He only told me on accident. When was he planning to tell me? The night before? The day of?" I shake my head, frustrated all over again.
"I know, it's such a stupid thing to argue about."
"No." Jeremy shakes his head, vehemently. "You're right to be upset. If you're such good friends, you deserved to know that he was going to move away. That's what friends do, they tell each other things. Especially things like that." He pauses and moves his other hand to our entwined hands, covering the top of my hand with his, so that my hand is enfolded in his hands. "Andrew is an idiot for screwing up his friendship with you. You're something special. And if he doesn't see that then he isn't worth your time anyway."
"I don't know..." I say quietly.
He sighs quietly, but he's looking directly into my eyes. Direct eye contact makes me nervous so I glance down. Jeremy drops his hold on my hand and then his hands are against my chin, and cheek, lifting my head up to look at him. "Brookie, don't let anyone bring you down. You deserve so much."
He's staring at me, right into my eyes again. Instead of looking into his eyes, I focus on the bridge of his nose, his eyebrows, the slight crinkles by his eyes. There's a small scar just above his left eyebrow and for just one second, I wonder how he got it. I realize how little I know about this boy, but how much he's in my thoughts. There's a few other faint scars scattered along his cheeks and I wonder if they're from when he got beat up. His gorgeous blue eyes flicker down to my lips quickly and I want nothing more than to feel them on my own. Suddenly, like he's read my mind, the lips I've been staring at are against mine. The shock of it takes my breath away, even though it's just a light touch. He pulls back a bit, to glance at me, maybe to see if I'm upset with him for kissing me.
I slowly bring my hands up, passing over his arms to wrap around his neck and I bring my lips to meet his. My eyes flutter shut out of either instinct or nerves and when our lips touch this time, he's less hesitant, nipping at my bottom lip. I part my lips as the kiss deepens. His lips are so warm, demanding, they move so perfectly against my own, causing my heart and stomach to flip and flitter. His hands trail down my back and around my waist and he pulls back for a moment. Jeremy pulls me up onto his lap, somehow simultaneously moving himself backward until he's against the wall. I'm straddling his lap, and then our lips are connected again and my heart is racing.
He moves one to hand to cup against the side of my neck. He breaks the kiss for a mere second and I manage to take in a breath before his lips are back on mine. His lips are slightly rough, chapped, but still somehow smooth at the same time. For the briefest of moments, I try to remember if I brushed my teeth after my shower, if my mouth is clean, but the thought gets pushed from my mind when his tongue slips past his lips, then past mine. His fingers begin tracing patterns on my back and my heart feels like its doing cartwheels in my chest.
It seems as though the months of us knowing each other have been leading up to this one moment and the hand against my back presses tightly against me, bringing me closer to his chest. His other hand moves to the back of my neck, and his cool fingers send tingles down my spine. A loud ringing shocks us both into jerking apart, but his hand on my back keeps me from moving off his lap. He tugs his phone and charger apart and swiping his thumb across the screen, answering the call.
I try not to eavesdrop, and focus on scrolling through the texts on my own phone. I have quite a few from Tyler and I scroll past them, ignoring them completely, for the time being. I read a few from Andrew, reading the apologies without feeling any sense of remorse for arguing with him. Jeremy's hand is tracing swirls up and down my thigh as he talks on the phone, and I wonder if he's doing it on purpose. He doesn't seem to realize that he's even doing it.
He's only on the phone for a few minutes and after he plugs his phone back into the charger, he leans his head against the wall with his eyes closed and he lets out a slow, long, sigh. I bite my lip, wondering if I should comment or not. After hesitating for another few seconds, I finally decide to say something. "Is everything okay?"
Jeremy's eyes flicker open and he just looks at me for a minute. Then he shrugs. "I don't know." He says. "My mom is coming down to visit sometime in the next week. It was Marlie on the phone. She wanted to let me know. Apparently, my mom and her husband have been arguing again. Her husband moved down to Windham, and mom's going down to visit him to work things out or something."
"Oh." I remember what he told me about his mom and my heart aches for him.
He nods. "Yeah. It's not the first time I'll see her since she kicked me out, but it's still always weird when I do see her."
The stairs creak loudly as someone makes their way up to them and Jeremy goes silent as the creaking passes our room. It must be Derek, on his way to bed. I know my guess is right when the light to his room switches on, flooding the hallway with light.
I turn back to Jeremy and he's sitting, with his eyes closed- his head leaning against the wall. "I'm so tired." He mumbles.
"Then sleep." I suggest. His eyes open and he stares at me for a minute, and then the tiniest of smiles crosses his face. "Just so you know, I like kissing you."
I grin. "I like kissing you, too."
His smile grows. "Then you won't mind too much if I kiss you again?"
I giggle and shake my head. "No, I won't mind." He smirks and then dips his head in, pressing his lips to mine one more time.
Emma - Thank you so much for pointing that out! That was a mistake! Haha that's supposed to be the heading for a later chapter. Oops! Ooh! I've never been to Australia but I've always wanted to visit! That's so cool, my mom's side is Scottish as well! Awh, thank you so much! Your comments always make me feel so wonderful! I know what you mean! Things are always greater if you have to wait a bit for them!! (That's why I've kept the kiss in suspense! hehe)
Chrystina J - Yay! I hate Tyler too haha! Ooh, that's cool! :) I've been through both Georgia and Virginia but I've never really visited them. I hope this wasn't too long of a wait for you!
Bookluver78 - I know right! He's such a buzz-kill! Hahaha I had to keep the kiss in suspense, don't hate me for that! Jack was the best person to stall it! hehehe I hope you like this chapter as well! Ooh, New Jersey! I met this awesome person from New Jersey back when I worked at the hotel in town! I can't wait to hear from you!
Miha - Eep! I'm so glad you loved the last chapter! I hope you like this one too! I have so much fun writing this! Especially when I get comments back like yours! You always make me soo happy!! That's so cool! I went to Canada once, on a family trip but I was three so I have no memory of it haha thanks for commenting! I love hearing from you!!
Laurial- Thank you soo much! My brother lived in Georgia for two years a while back and he loved it! I hope to hear from you again soon, and I hope you liked this chapter as well!
What ages are you guys? (I just really wanna get to know you all! If you have any questions you'd like to ask me go right ahead! Or you can follow me on twitter! I'll follow back! I'm @lovefood1434)
Scars And A Daisy - Chapter Twenty OneBrookie and Jeremy finally talk.
By Em Bishop