The Ghost of Kristina

Why do you do this to yourself?
Do this to your friends?
When you know that there are many
Who would mourn you at the end?
Why do you drink until you can't control
The things happening inside
Of your body, your mind,
I ask myself this as I sit here and cry....

You lose your characteristics,
Those of the friend that I know
As your personality flees
While the alcohol flows.
No matter what I try to say
And no matter what I would try to do
This surely should have some input
On the idiotic things you do.
And yet, I know that the instant that you leave
Nothing I have said will stay
In your jumbled thoughts, your chaotic mind

In fact, it will disappear by the next day.
I'm tired of picking up the shattered pieces
Of this person I used to know, to care about
And yet, the next time it happens, I will be here for you
All you need to do is shout.
That smacks of being a doormat
But what else can I do?
When I know my compassion doesn't matter
At least, apparently not to you.

I know I should give up on it
Denounce all hope
And yet, then I would worry
And wonder about how you would cope.
Would you keep on being fine, keep doing this?
Doing what all of us hate?
Or would your thirst for losing yourself
Finally negate
All that I have done for you?
Published: 5/8/2010
Bouquets and Brickbats