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To Know It's Your Fault - Chapter 4

I am so sorry it's been so long! I have no excuses except that I am extremely lazy at home and will stick to writing the story at school. Again I am sorry.
"I'm... I'm..."
"She's a girl you idiot! Tristan, leave Malory alone!" It was Gracia who had yelled and who was now standing next to me. "Come on Mal, let's go."
Go? Go where? To my class? Did we have this class together too? "Umm... Where?"
"To the restroom silly. Tristan can't follow us there." Gracia grabbed my hand and yanked me down the hallway. I wanted to freak out and pull away. I wasn't sure if I were a girl! I wanted to choose, not have someone choose for me!

I looked back at Tristan and saw him glaring at us. He was mad, he had me at the edge only to watch me be picked up by an eagle and flown away. "Tell me then, Ma-lor-ry! What are you?!"
I wish I could choose now, but I'm just forced with one choice. Looking at Tristan straight in the eye, I said, "I'm... a girl." Even if that was chosen for me.

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"So... let me get this straight... Tristan... you thought... hehe... you thought Malory was a guy?!" It was lunch now and for the past ten minutes Schuyler had been laughing at Tristan for his "mistake". Schuyler bit down on his sandwich and chewed still on the verge of busting out laughing again. I hope he wouldn't choke; Tristan on the other hand...

"Hurry up and choke you idiot! She looks like a dude! You can hardly tell she's a chick," Tristan said this giving me a threatening glare. He still didn't believe that I was a "girl". Then again neither could I.

I was still stuck on how I was supposed to act like a girl. I only ever acted like myself, but what if that wasn't how a girl acted? What if they acted entirely different than how I act? The whole restroom fiasco was heart racing; I could barely keep from dashing out. The makeup part didn't help either since I'd never worn makeup.
My shoulder was tapped and I shook my head looking up at Schuyler who was still chewing on his sandwich. What did he tap me for? To watch him eat? He pointed to the left of him which was where the windows of the cafeteria were. I turned and immediately my heart started racing.

Gracia sat with her friends at a table and was waving towards me. No-not waving. Signaling for me to join them at their table, a table full of girls. I acted like I didn't know what she was signaling by just waving before turning back around. Maybe that would send a signal that I was okay with the table I was at. A table full of guys, that being Schuyler, Tristan, and the boy from typing class, Adri?

"You know Gracia?" Asked Schuyler after finishing the last bite of his sandwich. I nodded and he gave a chuckle towards Tristan. "Ay Tristan, don't you have a crush on her?"
Tristan shot out of his chair and glared at Schuyler. "Don't say 'crush' that sounds so lame and no I don't. She's a bitch." I was surprised by the slight blush on Tristan's face as he said this. No way did he mean what he said. He liked Gracia, who hated him, because of me.
This thought made me sad. Here I was. A new student and already causing trouble for other people's love life; even if there wasn't really one. Still I couldn't help but blame myself; it was my fault after all.

Adri lifted his head from the table and gave a yawn. "Well... Tristan, you have been keeping a journal on her haven't you?" Schuyler and I now looked at Tristan with somewhat of disgust. I mean, who does that? Keep a journal on someone? A stalker maybe, was Tristan a stalker?
"Dude, you're a creeper," declared Schuyler.
"Shut up!"

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"Yay, Malory! We have another class together!" Exclaimed Schuyler dragging me through the hallways yet again. "Aren't you happy Malory?!"
I was, but still I was also stuck in dread. I only had this and two other classes before I went home and school was over, but that wasn't what had me in dread. Last period. Gym. I was forced to take the girl title at school, but still I didn't exactly feel comfortable changing in front of other girls. I didn't feel comfortable in the girl restrooms.

"We're here!" Schuyler opened a door and we enter a classroom with a bunch of black tables. Was this where we sat for class? "Up here, Mal." I looked toward, what I thought was the back of the class, to see Schuyler sitting in a desk. "This is where we sit, Mal."
I slowly walked over there and looked around. No one else was in class yet.

"Sit here." Schuyler pointed at the desk in front of him and gave a smile. I sat and looked around some more. Vocabulary words were sprawled out on the whiteboard and the long desk (teacher's desk I guess) was covered in piles of papers.
I turned in my seat and looked at Schuyler now who stared at me. Creepy. Had he been staring at me the entire time I was looking around? "Hey..." I mumbled.
His eyes widen and he shook his head. "S-sorry, I was spacing out. Happens a lot."

Good to know, I thought nodding my head. "That's okay. So, um... where is everyone?"
"Probably still messing around in the hallway; don't worry they'll all run in soon. Same with the teacher." Schuyler gave a shrug and started to stare me in the eyes. "I'm sorry about Tristan giving you trouble. I had no idea he was calling you a guy. What an idiot, huh?"

"Y-yeah..." I scratched the back of my head and looked down. What if I wanted to be a guy though and not a girl? Would he act like Tristan and be amazed? "Um... hey Schuyler, we're friends right?"
"Of course. We just met, but well, you already feel like a part of the group."
I bit my lip and looked around making sure the doors weren't opening yet. "What if I were a boy and not a girl?"
"Huh?" He gave me a queer look and then scratched his chin. "Well if you were a guy I don't think anything would change. You would still be part of the group. Why do you ask?"
"I was just curious if you would be in disbelief. Y'know, like Tristan." He nodded his head and I smiled. Would he accept me if I were both genders? Would it be too risky to ask? "Schuyler, what if I were a-."

The door suddenly opened and just like Schuyler had said kids were running in class, the teacher behind them. Schuyler turned around and watched as kids came through the door and I looked away. I almost practically told him I was both genders! A hermaphrodite! What was I thinking? I'm such an idiot!
The teacher took a sit in his desk and called row then. I answered as well did everyone else. I was introduced to the class and given funny looks by some kids who hadn't seen me yet. As always some kids thought I was a girl while others thought different. We wrote vocabulary words for the entire period and the teacher yelled at the boys farthest from his desk.

Through this whole time period I couldn't help, but mentally beat myself for almost telling Schuyler my secret. We barely knew each other! But still, he just seemed so accepting somehow. Not making fun of the question I asked him. Still people can change easily from hearing something like that. Like my dad's view on his family...
"Hey Mal, I already know you have Art class next and I won't be in there, but during gym I'll be all ears for that question you were going to ask. M'kay?" Schuyler gave a smile and lifted his bag over his shoulder just as the bell rang. I nodded and took his hand so he could drag me to my last class.
But did I want to ask him that question still?
Should Mal ask Schuyler still?
Yes.
No.
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Published: 2/10/2012
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